Crossroads to peace

Magadien Wentzel, Peace Ambassador and peace educator, Manenberg

During the period of apartheid, I was a prisoner long before I saw the inside of many prisons in South Africa. I spent almost 27 years in and out of prisons.

There, you are locked up in a prison community of violent people. To survive in prison, you are forced to be violent and feared. The award-winning, best-selling book, The Number by Jonny Steinberg, is based on my life.

There is also a movie about this, and many documentaries about me. I have been out of prison for 22 years now. But at a key moment, I was at a crossroads and was about to make a choice to go back to a life of crime. At the lowest point in my life, I met Professor Brian Williams, who helped to get me to see the true path of peace.

He believed in me, and so I thought to myself, that if he believes in me, why should I not believe in myself? I attended the peace education programme that he designed, and it completely changed and saved me. From that moment onwards, I committed myself to peace as the only genuine path to follow.

I was out on parole on June 19, 2003. I was excited but also scared at the same time. I didn't know what to expect because the post-apartheid world that I now entered was almost unrecognizable. I went to prison during apartheid, then nine years into the new democracy, I was released from prison. I wanted to shout out to the world to say that I am a changed man, please accept me. I personally thought that I would be accepted by my community and society, but they rejected me.

I was confused by the reaction, and my own sister proclaimed that I wouldn’t last three months outside. What made it worse was that no one was willing or brave enough to trust me with a job. I told them that I had changed and was reformed.

But the truth did not matter. No one believed in me, and no one was willing to give me a chance. I used to think that I was a fool to reject all the money and offers from rich drug dealers. However, I also knew that the ones who were willing to accept me as a brother were also the same ones who will take my life.

I tried my best to find a job to pay for rent, food, and necessities. But every place I applied for a job was unsuccessful. Those early years, at my home, it was a constant argument that I was a burden to the household. I was treated badly. I had no income and no ability to make an income. Anger grew in me. I became depressed and ended up on the streets as a homeless person.

Many years ago, I received a phone call from a friend, Gasant Abarder, the former editor of the Cape Argus. He asked me if I'm free to meet someone. At first, I assumed it was for a job. At that time, I needed an income as my health was failing, and I couldn't afford the medication needed. I was at my lowest and felt like maybe robbing just one shop or asking the “number” for help. But I then thought, let me first hear what Professor Brian had to say. I looked at him very closely. He was chatting away as if I were just another friend. He treated me with real respect, and this made me feel worthwhile.

The professor invited me to a Peace Builders workshop in Kensington. All the people there treated me as an equal and with dignity. It was at these peace workshops by the professor, I discovered what had unbalanced me. His peace education design and easy style blew my mind. I could feel the power of peace education, and it totally changed me.

In prison, and when I was out of prison, I attended all kinds of training. But none of the training shifted me towards a permanent recognition that peace is the only choice to make to live a full life. It was at one of those peace sessions that I discovered the true meaning of inner peace. I came to realise that without inner peace, I wouldn't be able to understand the real meaning of violence, peace, and development.

My journey from violence to becoming a certified Peace Educator is filled with great memories and new relationships. Together with the professor, I trained thousands of people in peace. Today, despite my modest circumstances, I live in peace. Using the professor's model, I continue to educate others in peace and development.